Your marriage is practically over, but you and your spouse are still sorting out the details — including how to manage child care and custody.
That means figuring out what to do about your nanny. Both you and your spouse expect to share custody of the kids, and neither of you wants to lose the nanny you have. Therefore, you need to sit down and talk about how you expect things to work between two households.
Common issues surrounding the nanny after divorce
You probably expect the nanny to move between households with your children for shared parenting time, so communication is key. Here are some of the issues to discuss:
- How the nanny will pay for child-related expenses, like gas for the car when the kids head to soccer practice and pizza on the way home
- How messages and schedule changes will be communicated to the nanny, whether that’s via a group text message with all parties, a master calendar or something else
- What limits each parent will observe when it comes to using the nanny as either a confidante or messenger (neither of which should happen)
- How the nanny’s schedule will be coordinated between two households (keeping in mind the fact that nobody likes their work schedule to constantly shift around)
- What parts of your nanny’s work contract need to be updated (and whether there needs to be an increase in pay or benefits because of the changes)
- Who will pay the nanny’s salary or provide other benefits (like a car), and how those costs will be divided
Since the nanny is a source of stability for your children and a big help to you both, it’s important to make things work. A written agreement with your co-parent can make things go a lot more smoothly — and provide a handy framework for resolving conflicts in the future.